Thursday, September 22, 2011
Wednesday Morning
My little cell phone sits beside me. I am ready to take Riley's next emergency. I can handle them. What bothers me is that Riley is on his own. Will the person beside him during his moment of need comfort him? Will he feel safe or will he be frightened. Sending him off to school is a comfort for me. He enjoys it, I can tell. He returns smiling. Yet, he is alone. More alone than any of us can understand.
Below is an article found on www.sengifted.org. As I consider the education of both my special needs child and typically developing child, I am reminded to watch that both are being prepared for their future while enjoying their childhood. Their school education may be worlds apart but the goals are the same.
boating with Freedom Waters Foundation
http://southernboating.com/blog/category/editors-blog/
September Back-To-School Suggestions
By Wenda Sheard
SENG’s vision is a world where gifted, talented, and creative individuals are supported to build gratifying, meaningful lives and contribute to the well-being of others.
How can parents best support their gifted, talented, and creative children at the beginning of the school year? I offer three suggestions.
Teach Children Philosophies of Education
I suggest that parents discuss with their children the purpose of education. Exposing young children to what great philosophers have thought about education not only teaches children history, philosophy, and education, but also helps them to create their own educational goals—goals that may differ significantly from the goals of other children.
When exploring what great philosophers have thought about education, children might notice three main purposes of education:
Explain the Necessity of Knowledge, Communion, and Expression
Another way that parents might support their gifted, talented, and creative children at the beginning of the school year is by reading P. Susan Jackson’s article "Bright Star - Black Sky: A Phenomenological Study of Depression as a Window into the Psyche of the Gifted Adolescent (see the end of this column for the online link). I recommend that parents read the article first before deciding whether, when, and how to share the article’s excellent insights with their children.
In the article, Jackson explains that gifted teens have an absolute need for knowledge of themselves and of physical and spiritual phenomena, for strong emotional or spiritual communion with others, and for expression of their emotions and feelings. Reading the article at the beginning of each school year might help parents and children (if sufficiently mature) to understand that beginning a school year is not a simple matter; each school year presents new opportunities and challenges for finding the knowledge, communion, and expression that Jackson found critical to the lives of gifted teens.
During the first weeks of the school year, parents and children can consider how the school year will affect all aspects of each child’s life. Will the child have sufficient opportunities for knowledge and for self-knowledge? Will the child have time at school or elsewhere to interact with true peers, not just age-mates? Will the child have time and methods to express emotions and feelings? Parents and children should consider finding non-school times to fill whatever gaps might exist in a given child’s school hours.
Offer Social and Emotional Hints
Most parents understand that the acquisition of knowledge is a small part of any school experience. Most teachers are keenly aware that the school day involves not just knowledge, but also social times and emotional events. In this last section, I offer three hints that parents might offer their gifted, talented, and creative children at the beginning of a new school year.
The first hint comes from Benjamin Franklin, who realized that by asking someone a favor, you endear yourself to that person. Counterintuitive, yes, but it works! I suggest that you and your child research what’s known as the Benjamin Franklin Effect. Your child might then decide to try out Franklin’s idea at school as a way to build friendship and respect.
Another friendship-building hint that I have shared over the years with new students is to look around the room and find students who look lonely. Then, with a smile on your face, go up to each of those children, ask them about themselves, and listen well. Smiling is a fantastic way to gain friends. Helping others who look lonely is an excellent way to exhibit and to build a generous spirit. Asking people about themselves and listening carefully to their answers is a social skill that even many adults could improve.
Sometimes a gifted, talented, and creative child will spend a school year without true peers in school. When this happens, parents can share yet another hint—encourage the child to approach the school year with the lens of an anthropologist.
Yes, that’s right—teach the child about the field of anthropology and engage the child in studying the culture of the school. Learning about anthropology and applying an anthropological lens, at the child's level of understanding, to the school experience will help the gifted child learn about and reflect a great deal on people, social structures, and child development. Parents who spend the time necessary to guide their budding anthropologist will benefit from increased and honest communication that might lead to better understanding of the child’s school experience.
Conclusion
For more hints and suggestions, I recommend the book A Parent's Guide to Gifted Children (Great Potential Press, 2007). That book, which is the core of the SENG Model Parenting Groups, well explains the nature and nurture of gifted, talented, and creative children.
If there is a SENG Model Parenting Group starting in your area, I highly recommend that you join the group. If no groups are currently available in your area, I recommend you consider being trained as a SENG facilitator. The next SENG Model Parenting Group Facilitator Training will be October 7-8, 2011, in Charlotte, North Carolina.
Wenda Sheard, J.D., Ph.D. is an emeritus board member and past president of SENG. She currently teaches near London, England, and serves as a trustee on the Council of Management of the UK's National Association for Gifted Children.
References
Below is an article found on www.sengifted.org. As I consider the education of both my special needs child and typically developing child, I am reminded to watch that both are being prepared for their future while enjoying their childhood. Their school education may be worlds apart but the goals are the same.
boating with Freedom Waters Foundation
http://southernboating.com/blog/category/editors-blog/
September Back-To-School Suggestions
By Wenda Sheard
SENG’s vision is a world where gifted, talented, and creative individuals are supported to build gratifying, meaningful lives and contribute to the well-being of others.
How can parents best support their gifted, talented, and creative children at the beginning of the school year? I offer three suggestions.
Teach Children Philosophies of Education
I suggest that parents discuss with their children the purpose of education. Exposing young children to what great philosophers have thought about education not only teaches children history, philosophy, and education, but also helps them to create their own educational goals—goals that may differ significantly from the goals of other children.
When exploring what great philosophers have thought about education, children might notice three main purposes of education:
- Education serves the purpose of preparing children for adult life, including preparing them to support themselves as adults. Accordingly, the United States Department of Education’s stated mission is: “to promote student achievement and preparation for global competitiveness by fostering educational excellence and ensuring equal access.”
- Some philosophers emphasize that education should prepare children for good citizenship. Plato (circa 400 B.C.) and John Locke (1632-1704) advocated virtue and good citizenship as the aims of education. Plato wrote: “And we must remember further that we are speaking of the education, not of a trainer, or of the captain of a ship, but of a perfect citizen who knows how to rule and how to obey.” Locke wrote: “Learning must be had, but in the second place, as subservient only to greater qualities.”
- Education also serves the purpose of providing children with an enjoyable childhood worth living and remembering fondly. John Dewey (1859-1952) felt strongly that education should respect childhood: “[The best teachers] give the pupils something to do, not something to learn; and the doing is of such a nature as to demand thinking or the intentional noting of connections; learning naturally results.” Maria Montessori (1870-1952) similarly advocated happy childhoods: “Education is not something which the teacher does ... it is a natural process which develops spontaneously in the human being.”
Explain the Necessity of Knowledge, Communion, and Expression
Another way that parents might support their gifted, talented, and creative children at the beginning of the school year is by reading P. Susan Jackson’s article "Bright Star - Black Sky: A Phenomenological Study of Depression as a Window into the Psyche of the Gifted Adolescent (see the end of this column for the online link). I recommend that parents read the article first before deciding whether, when, and how to share the article’s excellent insights with their children.
In the article, Jackson explains that gifted teens have an absolute need for knowledge of themselves and of physical and spiritual phenomena, for strong emotional or spiritual communion with others, and for expression of their emotions and feelings. Reading the article at the beginning of each school year might help parents and children (if sufficiently mature) to understand that beginning a school year is not a simple matter; each school year presents new opportunities and challenges for finding the knowledge, communion, and expression that Jackson found critical to the lives of gifted teens.
During the first weeks of the school year, parents and children can consider how the school year will affect all aspects of each child’s life. Will the child have sufficient opportunities for knowledge and for self-knowledge? Will the child have time at school or elsewhere to interact with true peers, not just age-mates? Will the child have time and methods to express emotions and feelings? Parents and children should consider finding non-school times to fill whatever gaps might exist in a given child’s school hours.
Offer Social and Emotional Hints
Most parents understand that the acquisition of knowledge is a small part of any school experience. Most teachers are keenly aware that the school day involves not just knowledge, but also social times and emotional events. In this last section, I offer three hints that parents might offer their gifted, talented, and creative children at the beginning of a new school year.
The first hint comes from Benjamin Franklin, who realized that by asking someone a favor, you endear yourself to that person. Counterintuitive, yes, but it works! I suggest that you and your child research what’s known as the Benjamin Franklin Effect. Your child might then decide to try out Franklin’s idea at school as a way to build friendship and respect.
Another friendship-building hint that I have shared over the years with new students is to look around the room and find students who look lonely. Then, with a smile on your face, go up to each of those children, ask them about themselves, and listen well. Smiling is a fantastic way to gain friends. Helping others who look lonely is an excellent way to exhibit and to build a generous spirit. Asking people about themselves and listening carefully to their answers is a social skill that even many adults could improve.
Sometimes a gifted, talented, and creative child will spend a school year without true peers in school. When this happens, parents can share yet another hint—encourage the child to approach the school year with the lens of an anthropologist.
Yes, that’s right—teach the child about the field of anthropology and engage the child in studying the culture of the school. Learning about anthropology and applying an anthropological lens, at the child's level of understanding, to the school experience will help the gifted child learn about and reflect a great deal on people, social structures, and child development. Parents who spend the time necessary to guide their budding anthropologist will benefit from increased and honest communication that might lead to better understanding of the child’s school experience.
Conclusion
For more hints and suggestions, I recommend the book A Parent's Guide to Gifted Children (Great Potential Press, 2007). That book, which is the core of the SENG Model Parenting Groups, well explains the nature and nurture of gifted, talented, and creative children.
If there is a SENG Model Parenting Group starting in your area, I highly recommend that you join the group. If no groups are currently available in your area, I recommend you consider being trained as a SENG facilitator. The next SENG Model Parenting Group Facilitator Training will be October 7-8, 2011, in Charlotte, North Carolina.
Wenda Sheard, J.D., Ph.D. is an emeritus board member and past president of SENG. She currently teaches near London, England, and serves as a trustee on the Council of Management of the UK's National Association for Gifted Children.
References
Jackson, P. Susan, "Bright star --
black sky: A phenomenological study of depression as a window into the
psyche of the gifted adolescent," Roeper Review. 1998 Feb 20(3) 215-221,
available online at http://sengifted.org/articles_counseling/Jackson_BrightStarBlackSky.shtml
Monday, September 19, 2011
Seize the Day! Literally
5:00 am From his hospital bed I hear the familiar intake of breath as a muscle spasm begins. Switching on the light I discover Riley in a clonic seizure. Grabbing him up, talking to him, massaging his limbs; the seizure subsides in moments. Four years ago, this episode could have lasted for hours. Now with all the anti-seizure drugs he is often able to cease without intervention.
5:02 am On with the day. After rearranging him repeatedly throughout the night, this meant falling back to sleep and oversleeping. John and Ronan always rise by 5:40 am. Oddly, they oversleep as well. This is very strange. I cannot explain Ronan oversleeping. John however has been working non-stop and just started trying Valerian Root Tea to help with his insomnia: it appears to actually work.
8:00 am Riley is off on the bus with a new assistant, Antonetta. Assistant Liz had to cut back on her hours; we are very disappointed. John and Ronan have already headed in their separate directions.
8:05 Plan for my day: dishes and laundry, desperately needed class at the gym, paperwork, sell some Arbonne, collect Riley from school by 2 pm, Integrity Biofeedback appointment for Riley and myself, pick up Ronan, oh - did I get Riley back into Dr. Stohler's chiropractor routine, riding by 5 pm (we missed last week), is the shower set up for Riley, do I have everything Ronan will need for homework at the barn, are tomorrow's appointments set up, is dinner planned for the late return.... then start it all over again.
8:35 am Phone call from Lee County Transportation. Riley has suffered a seizure on board the bus and EMS is with him now. Then EMS/Bonita Springs Fire-Rescue is on the phone. I must sign in person for the bus to be released from the roadside.
8:40 am Heading somewhere in the vicinity of Old 41 and E. Terry. How do I handle this now. Seizure's are part of our life. Riley has quite a lot of drugs in his system to manage this disorder. The last neurology appointment, I was instructed to administer Diastat after the next cluster seizure - this must qualify. However, that window has come and gone. Riley is ready to go on with his day. Stimulation is better for him than coddling him. Yet, Riley is a "hot potato." Everyone who gets him in their arms tosses him back to mom or dad as quickly as possible. Do I just take him home to humor everyone else? No thank you. Riley needs to live a life. I need to get a life. On the way I talk to school's nursing office: I love that office, let him have his day - what do ya'll think the big green frog backpack hanging from the wheelchair full of Diastat and medical and contact information is for! (no one touched it by the way)
9:00 am I have found them, bus, EMS, ambulance. Screeching the jeep into a tiny little used car lot, I am there.
Camera in hand. Yes, I have my camera. These are the moments to record as far as I am concerned and I have missed plenty of them. EMS spies the crazy woman in ripped gym clothes, uncombed hair, red backpack purse and camera slung around the neck climbing aboard the bus.
I am greeted by a concerned driver, Louis... he spoke at least 20 words this morning, he must have been really nervous. Welcome to bus 27126 Antonetta! And then three rather serious EMS technicians. Loosen up guys, perhaps you've encountered seizure disorders before. Then of course Riley, still seated in his chair is smiling, laughing, and kicking - just like the last time I tracked down the bus and ambulance. Good times.
9:10 am.
Sign some papers.
Kisses for Riley.
Big "Hi" for the little girl across the aisle tugging on my arm. "Hi" again. Yes, "Hi, Sweetheart."
Merry waves from the boy ahead in the bus for the men in uniform.
Riley laughs.
Uniformed man stands up straighter and pulls in his chin.
Ambulance drives away.
"HI!"
BIG WAVE!
More seriousness... more laughs.
On your way please school bus #27126.
Oh yeah, swing by the pharmacy for Leviteracetam. Say yes to drugs.
Where was my day going? Seize your day, Stace!
We're gonna have our day, darn it! Stacie Wiesenbaugh
5:02 am On with the day. After rearranging him repeatedly throughout the night, this meant falling back to sleep and oversleeping. John and Ronan always rise by 5:40 am. Oddly, they oversleep as well. This is very strange. I cannot explain Ronan oversleeping. John however has been working non-stop and just started trying Valerian Root Tea to help with his insomnia: it appears to actually work.
8:00 am Riley is off on the bus with a new assistant, Antonetta. Assistant Liz had to cut back on her hours; we are very disappointed. John and Ronan have already headed in their separate directions.
8:05 Plan for my day: dishes and laundry, desperately needed class at the gym, paperwork, sell some Arbonne, collect Riley from school by 2 pm, Integrity Biofeedback appointment for Riley and myself, pick up Ronan, oh - did I get Riley back into Dr. Stohler's chiropractor routine, riding by 5 pm (we missed last week), is the shower set up for Riley, do I have everything Ronan will need for homework at the barn, are tomorrow's appointments set up, is dinner planned for the late return.... then start it all over again.
8:35 am Phone call from Lee County Transportation. Riley has suffered a seizure on board the bus and EMS is with him now. Then EMS/Bonita Springs Fire-Rescue is on the phone. I must sign in person for the bus to be released from the roadside.
8:40 am Heading somewhere in the vicinity of Old 41 and E. Terry. How do I handle this now. Seizure's are part of our life. Riley has quite a lot of drugs in his system to manage this disorder. The last neurology appointment, I was instructed to administer Diastat after the next cluster seizure - this must qualify. However, that window has come and gone. Riley is ready to go on with his day. Stimulation is better for him than coddling him. Yet, Riley is a "hot potato." Everyone who gets him in their arms tosses him back to mom or dad as quickly as possible. Do I just take him home to humor everyone else? No thank you. Riley needs to live a life. I need to get a life. On the way I talk to school's nursing office: I love that office, let him have his day - what do ya'll think the big green frog backpack hanging from the wheelchair full of Diastat and medical and contact information is for! (no one touched it by the way)
9:00 am I have found them, bus, EMS, ambulance. Screeching the jeep into a tiny little used car lot, I am there.
Camera in hand. Yes, I have my camera. These are the moments to record as far as I am concerned and I have missed plenty of them. EMS spies the crazy woman in ripped gym clothes, uncombed hair, red backpack purse and camera slung around the neck climbing aboard the bus.
I am greeted by a concerned driver, Louis... he spoke at least 20 words this morning, he must have been really nervous. Welcome to bus 27126 Antonetta! And then three rather serious EMS technicians. Loosen up guys, perhaps you've encountered seizure disorders before. Then of course Riley, still seated in his chair is smiling, laughing, and kicking - just like the last time I tracked down the bus and ambulance. Good times.
9:10 am.
Sign some papers.
Kisses for Riley.
Big "Hi" for the little girl across the aisle tugging on my arm. "Hi" again. Yes, "Hi, Sweetheart."
Merry waves from the boy ahead in the bus for the men in uniform.
Riley laughs.
Uniformed man stands up straighter and pulls in his chin.
Ambulance drives away.
"HI!"
BIG WAVE!
More seriousness... more laughs.
On your way please school bus #27126.
Oh yeah, swing by the pharmacy for Leviteracetam. Say yes to drugs.
Where was my day going? Seize your day, Stace!
We're gonna have our day, darn it! Stacie Wiesenbaugh
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Week of Success and Childhood Heartbreak
Success
I am so excited to discover the results and want to hear everyone's experience. Thank you Chico's!
Heartbreak
Three years ago Ronan entered Bobbi Noonan's VPK. As the year went on, one of the other Dad's, Don, and I set up regular playdates for the boys to give each other some child free afternoons. Ronan and Ethan became inseparable and adored each other from the start, even asking for sleep overs.
SWFL has been particularly hard hit by the economy and Ethan's parents have decided to relocate to Florida's east coast where businesses are significantly busier and his mom has already found a great new position as interior decorator extraordinaire. We are all so happy for the family for making so many positive changes in their life! We will miss them dreadfully, however. Ronan has taken his loss very hard.
"Can we move to Fort Lauderdale too?" he asked through tears last week.
"No, for now we will stay here but you will still be friends." I tried to comfort him.
"But, I love him!" Now I was heartbroken as well.
Friends forever pose with their teacher, the beautiful Miss Lauren.
Always the sweetest and most considerate child I have ever met outside of my own. Ethan considers Riley his next best buddy. Riley has a friend! And he's leaving...
Ronan sobbed all the way to school that morning, heartbroken.
We will still have playdates! Better gas up the car.
Early Thursday morning after the last sleep over Ethan heads out the door to Fort Lauderdale with his new lion webkinz, "Mr. Ronan."
Late that evening a picture came through my cell from the amazing Ms. Maija. Ms. Maija is Riley's other friend forever as well. Ethan held his new buddy tight and hasn't let go since.
Yes, Ethan you are still part of this family. We all love you.
We are all special... by Stacie Wiesenbaugh
Saturday, September 17, 2011
MIXIT TV
Remember today is International Coastal Cleanup Day! Get to a cleanup site near you if possible this morning, you may need a shower afterward but you will feel great for being part of it. Unfortunately, Riley's cold persists so we will have to clean up on our own another day... I promise.
Produced by and for people with disabilities.
Produced by and for people with disabilities.
New television program in England.
Friday, September 16, 2011
Living with Logan: Jackson's Smile
Living with Logan: Jackson's Smile: There's something about a child's smile. The look of wonder and delight all over their face that makes you smile in return, and feel better ...
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Overfilled
http://blog.friendshipcircle.org/2011/09/14/11-special-needs-novels-that-will-touch-your-heart/Overfilled
is how I feel emotionally and timewise.
There just is not enough of me to get to everything I want to do.
Riley's cold from Labor Day weekend just cannot be shaken. Poor little thing really needs to get a good clean breathe. This week he has been sent home from school and lost out on horseback riding. PT was "messy" but he got through it. Good thing we've got drugs:-) But they wear him out too.
Great big thank you to all who have signed up for Friday's event at Chico's! If you don't hear from me personally to remind you (big oops if you don't), please contact me.
I have taken to devoting one post at the end of each month to share the very many special needs blog posts which speak to me... this one will not wait because she speaks to my today where my head is:
The Irritating Factor
Hero horses: Sarah Bombard won strength and confidence from Naples Equestrian Challenge
http://www.naplesnews.com/news/2011/sep/05/hero-horses-cerebral-palsy-victim-sarah-bombard-wo/
There just is not enough of me to get to everything I want to do.
Riley's cold from Labor Day weekend just cannot be shaken. Poor little thing really needs to get a good clean breathe. This week he has been sent home from school and lost out on horseback riding. PT was "messy" but he got through it. Good thing we've got drugs:-) But they wear him out too.
Great big thank you to all who have signed up for Friday's event at Chico's! If you don't hear from me personally to remind you (big oops if you don't), please contact me.
Sharing today because that's what I do and I just can't help myself
I have taken to devoting one post at the end of each month to share the very many special needs blog posts which speak to me... this one will not wait because she speaks to my today where my head is:
The Irritating Factor
Hero horses: Sarah Bombard won strength and confidence from Naples Equestrian Challenge
http://www.naplesnews.com/news/2011/sep/05/hero-horses-cerebral-palsy-victim-sarah-bombard-wo/
Sheryl Soukup of Naples Equestrian Challenge is in the business of changing lives
For the Love of Blogs started a group for Parenting Special Needs, hop on over and link your blog up.
11 Special Needs Novels That Will Touch Your Heart from The Friendship Circle.
11 Special Needs Novels That Will Touch Your Heart from The Friendship Circle.
We are all Special... by Stacie Wiesenbaugh
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