"...To me, the difference between good grief and bad grief is that good is the kind that you don’t bury.
Instead, you pull it up to the top by talking about it, sharing it with others, writing about it and learning to accept it for what it is – a physical, emotional or spiritual end that needs to have resolution in order for you to peacefully move on (with special needs children it can certainly be categorized as hopes, dreams and expectations or much more).
Bad grief, on the other hand, is the kind that can fester and cause you to live life harder because you have emotions or communications that are unresolved. The bad affects all of your relationships over the long haul. Think about loss of any kind – physical, emotional or spiritual – and you might find that they have had a dramatic affect on your life..."
Perfect timing on this post by Tim Gort. I was just questioning why I need to blog about special needs and wondering if I should stop. I see my mission clearly enough, but am so far a little shy of my goal. Writing as the mother of a special needs child is at risk of being one dimensional. I am limited further by not intending to be a full-disclosure and a reluctance to speak for my husband. He is just as much a part of this process and wounded by Riley's disabilities every bit as much as I am.
Writing about this subject certainly exposes the raw emotions of my family. It also opens me up to even more misinterpretation when I am trying to create just the opposite with some understanding. Should I choose to go forward I have quite a task ahead of me. Please be patient with this process. Most importantly I am trying to share the experience and not trying to solve anything by it. I share it for those who may benefit, perhaps grandparents, aunts and uncles who are in a position to need insight.
Thank you all for understanding and not trying to fix it:-) Our future is for us to discover. Stacie